Turning Dark Energy into Positive Action

I’ve discovered something interesting. I’m living in one of the most difficult economic times in my lifetime. Investments decrease, through no spending of mine. Prices keep going up and income keeps going down. At times, it seems the world has gone crazy. Then why has my mind erupted with energy, enthusiasm, and creativity?

I’ve known for a long time, when life runs smooth, and I’m happy and contented, I don’t make any efforts to change. Why should I? Everything is fine. It isn’t until things go drastically wrong, and my life turns upside down that I get motivated to make things better.

Life isn’t smooth now, circumstances have changed, and my happy, peaceful life has been turned topsy-turvy. I don’t like seeing my savings disappear, or the cost of living take a huge leap upward. I’m being thrown way outside my comfort zone. My instinct, when this happens, isn’t to fall into worry, or depression, or anger.

I’ve discovered something about my own nature. I like challenge. When life smacks me down, I fight back. And I’ve discovered something else. Anger, fear, and worry don’t cripple me. There is a lot of energy in those darker emotions. They are strong emotions that I can use to channel into positive responses.

My art has taken a big leap. I learned to throw away my photo references, and paint what I call Flights of Fancy. I put watercolor washes on paper and let the paint reveal itself to me. This is a very different way of creating for me, and it’s opened up my mind in most unexpected ways.

I’m downsizing my surroundings, de-cluttering my home. Getting rid of stuff. As my surroundings become more serene and peaceful, my mind explodes with new ideas.

Along with the art, I’ve started writing poetry. I never wrote a poem in my life, but suddenly, while doing dishes, I have to sit down, and save the words before I lose them. I go to bed, only to get back up, and write down the words that flood into my mind.

My novel? It’s written, not polished or ready, but it’s complete. Organizational skills that I never dreamed I possessed are popping up. Energy is flooding my body, ideas are moving through my mind with lightening speed. Confidence dominates my personality.

I don’t have a clue where all this will lead, but I love the creativity that is filling me, the peace that is surrounding me, finding the focus and direction that I lacked before.

I’m convinced this is in response to me being pushed out of my comfort zone. I’m scrambling for a new foothold, trying to find a new balance. In the process, I’m discovering new talents, redefining old ones, and taking uncomfortable emotions, and using their energy to fuel new dreams. Hard times? Yes, but also energizing and exciting. I’m moving forward.Life is an adventure and I’m eager to explore.

About C. L. Roth

C. L. Roth was born and raised in Kansas. She has a deep love for the prairie state, the Flint Hills in particular. She is married, has two sons, four grandchildren, is an artist, writer and full-time caregiver. Life experience has taught her that normal doesn't exist, it's the journey that matters, and the best way to succeed is simply: Never Give Up.
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