My Journey

My Journey

Life is such a strange journey. So much of it seems cut and dried. We go to school, make the best grades we can. We choose a career and at some point, if we’re lucky, we fall in love and get married.

We go to work. For most of us, that entails a job outside the home, but for others the work is at home.  As a full-time wife, mother, and caregiver, I understand that working at home can be the biggest job ever. There aren’t any vacations, very little time off, and, on the caregiver front,  most likely no retirement.

I look back on my life and, for me, the 1980’s are always referred to as ‘the dark years’. I won’t go into a lot of detail except to say that I was stressed, seriously sleep deprived, and in danger of going under emotionally. Writing saved my sanity.

Back in the ‘dark years’ when my older son was struggling with a life-threatening medical condition, when my youngest son wasn’t sleeping more than two hours at a time and screaming every time we left the house, when sleep deprivation was slowly sucking me into a morass of exhaustion and depression–I wrote.

I didn’t realize writing was a life line. I thought of it as escapism. I needed to be somewhere else. Someplace I could control. I wanted, for just a little while, to be somebody else in situations as far removed from my every day life as I could get. So–I wrote.

I started to take online classes, mail order courses, and weekend college classes. As my personal life calmed down, I discovered workshops and conferences. At some point, I woke up to the realization that ‘ I ‘ could have a life outside of wife, family and home. I mattered. I was important, not just to others because that was never an issue, but to me. I remembered how to take care of ‘me’.

This journey didn’t happen overnight. It has taken years for me to get to this moment in time.

I didn’t realize, back in the ‘dark years’,  that I would get to a point where I would feel compelled to share my work. I never dreamed that I would be driven by a muse gone wild, to create and share my stories.

But it happened. My journey has led me to a hilltop in life where I can stand and survey all that is behind me and see my path clearly laid out before me. It’s not a straight path. It’s not even a level road, but it winds and wanders through a beautiful, wild landscape. It holds mystery for me and wonders yet to explore.

I love this journey I’m on. I see no final destination. Just a path that pulls me forward. I hope I never get to a point in life when I sit down because the journey is too enticing.

14 Responses to My Journey

  1. Welcome to this exciting writing journey, and even if our paths cross and seperate and cross again, we are richer for the experience. I love the website!

  2. C. L. Roth says:

    Diane,
    You’re the first person to make it to my ‘website’. I was very excited to wake up this morning and have a notice that I needed to approve a comment.
    You’re totally right. My life is greatly enriched by this experience. No boredom here. Just lots and lots of work but its work that gives me bone-deep joy.

  3. Marti says:

    I love that you’re using your own artwork for this site! Your horses are wonderful!

    You’re starting off with a bang, with a great blog that should touch a lot of people. Congratulations on fine work!

    • C. L. Roth says:

      Marti, I’m a newbie at this, stumbling in the dark. My nephew, Jeff, has been giving me a lot of help. This website is a work in progress but it’s great fun. Thank you for visiting.

  4. Anita says:

    It cannot be said enough, you are truly an inspirational woman. 🙂 love ya

  5. Becky says:

    C –

    I love your story, and am very glad to have met you and some of your family. I can’t wait to read more of your writings – you have a wonderful talent!

    Becky

  6. Shirley Guldenschuh says:

    Lookin’ good. Blessings on this exciting new venture.

  7. Kay says:

    That pretty, shy, smart girl I knew in high school has really blossomed. I always knew there was a lot of talent lying under the shy shell. You will make your mark, now and always…

    • C. L. Roth says:

      Hi, I’m glad you found your way over here. I’ll be adding a lot more to the website as I find time. Wish I’d ‘blossomed’ a lot younger but then, I guess I had to wait for all the life experiences to teach me something. Nice to touch base with you. Pop in more often. I get homesick once in awhile.

      • Kay says:

        Well – here I have been not that far from you… and now I am moving to Iowa. I will check in on you!

        Other than Ron Edwards, we need someone from Kansas that is “celebrity”!

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